As we go old…

In Everyday Life on January 6, 2012 by erwindlee

It is a privilege to interact with more mature people everyday. Some of them I get to talk on the phone, or people who just walk in the store to buy a thing or two, pastors and counselors in CCF, and also my parents. One thing that struck me is that people can grow into just generally two kinds – one who thinks and demand to be respected, and the other one is the person just because of who they are makes you naturally respect them. I want to be the later.

There is this old girl from the association my dad belongs to, she is so disrespectful on the phone. She just says “Hey,”, no please, no can I talk to, no anything. She is an example of a person with no hope, no wish in life, and just doing her tasks. She does not respect people she is calling and thus, I doubt if other people also respects her.

My dad always asks me to join these organizations, but why join an organization of disrespectful, proud, rich, old guys? Do I want to be like them? Of course not!

Whenever I read the book Rich Dad, Poor Dad, I can clearly identify my dad as the poor dad. He has the poor mentality. He thinks he is old, he does not want to work, he wants to sit down, shout, curse, and fight with people. But… just like Poor Dad in the book, he thinks the way to go is saving money, and living below ones means. It is laziness actually that pulls him down. My dad always demands respect from people, but even our customers tell him that he needs to respect himself first. It is pathetic. One day, he smoked his cigarette inside our office where there is a big no smoking sign, I closed the door hurriedly and unintentionally made a loud noise. My dad felt he was disrespected, but actually, he disrespected everyone in our store by smoking inside. How can someone demand respect when he does not respect the right of other people?

How we handle life, how we live, and not how much money we have in the bank will determine whether or not people will look up to us, and respect us. You cannot demand respect from people. Respect is a complicated thing. As we grow old, we need to grow more and more respectful so other people will respect us as well. Grow to be more considerate, more understanding, more humble, more loving. I am failing in many of these, but I hope that I will be better.



The busiest day of my life

In Everyday Life on December 6, 2011 by erwindlee

I am dead tired everyday, rushing, and things are piling on top of each other. This is what I am up to, to name a few:

> house renovation

> wedding preps (music, gift registry, guests, invitation, etc.)

> web projects

> family business

I am happy to be involved with my wedding preparation. I failed a lot of times, but I learned a lot. I wish I was trained to be stressed and handle it gracefully. Looking back the more stressful days on thinking about where to finance my wedding, I feel very accomplished that I didn’t stop helping Jumie, even at the smallest possible ways. I feel very grateful and blessed to have Jumie, I wish I did more to make her feel blessed and grateful to have me. I love Jumie.

Dianne sent me this email which was very timely.

The Blessing of Breaking Nets
via Pastor Steven Furtick by Steven Furtick on 11/8/11

In Luke 5:1-5, the disciples had a problem.
They had been fishing all night, but their nets were empty.

In Luke 5:6-11, after they followed Jesus’ instruction to put out their nets again, the disciples faced a different problem.
Their nets were so full, they started to break.

Recently, I was facing some challenges that seemed overwhelming to me.
I found myself getting a bad attitude, feeling sorry for myself a little, and wishing I didn’t have to carry quite so much stress.

And then it was like the Lord spoke to me:
“At least your nets are full.”

That put it in perspective.

See, a lot of our problems are full net problems.
The kinds of problems that many others would love to have.
Breaking nets are the result of God’s blessings in our lives, if we choose to see it that way.

A messy house full of healthy kids.
A growing church with expansion needs.
A busy schedule because of abundant responsibilities and relationships.

Sure, it’s a strain to pull in the nets when they’re tearing apart from the heavy load.
But it beats sitting in the boat staring at nothing.


Losing one friend, the Internet

In Everyday Life on November 15, 2011 by erwindlee

Today, I was judged. Today, I hurt people who are important to me. I said words that were careless.

I miss the days when the internet is free, when it is not searchable, and when social media is a no big deal. Those were the days when you can just type whatever you want and tell the world! (well, to whoever discovers it). Those were the days that the internet is a close friend. (Pathetic…). Today, everybody uses the internet, everybody has access to facebook. Update your status message and people will start commenting and telling you their own ideas. Facebook.

Today, I lost my close friend… the internet. Today, I let you go. You’re everybody’s friend. You refused to keep my secrets. Today, I am alone with God.


The Feeling after disobeying

In Christian Life on October 9, 2011 by erwindlee

After attending CCFs baptism class, my belief that baptism has nothing to do with salvation was reaffirmed. I fell in love more with what Jesus has done. I agree more with the coherence of the Bible, that when Jesus said He is the Way, the Truth, and the Life, it means no other way, no other formula. There is just one narrow way to salvation, and to God, and it is only through Jesus. We have no contribution, it was all done for us. That class also made clear to me that baptism is an act of obedience, Jesus said that the apostles should go to the nations and baptize them in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit, so yes, I need to be baptize, but I do this as an act of obedience, not a ticket to heaven.

I never felt this way after disobeying commandments of God. I sin everyday, maybe through a bad thought, a lie (white or gray, or black, or whatever color), disobeying parents, dishonoring them, etc. but yesterday was different. Today is already Sunday, normally I am excited to go to church to worship the Lord, and listen to His message, but today, I feel tired and I also feel embarrassed to let Him see me. I know even on my bed as I am writing this, the Lord God sees me and knows my heart, it really feels different. I feel I am unworthy of going to Him because I disobeyed Him. I let Satan win yesterday. I let someone hinder me from getting baptize. All my things are ready, I am very excited to get baptism done and over with until Satan used someone to stop and hinder me, well, I let him.

So this is how Adam and Eve felt, when they sewed clothes made out of fig leaves. God said where are you, we’re here, but we are ashamed because we are naked. I feel the same. I said sorry to the Lord, but it really feels different today. God is convicting me. I don’t know how God will bring back the peace in my heart, and how He can welcome me back, but I know God is the God of mercy and forgiveness. I will wait for His forgiveness and He will give me. He will fix my heart and He will make me feel his open arms.

Lord forgive me for disobeying. Thank you for helping me grow and I appreciate that you are real in my life.



In Christian Life, Everyday Life on September 24, 2011 by erwindlee

The Bible says, God curses and punishing man for their sins up to the third or fourth generation but how about those who love God? God blesses and shows love up to a thousand generations. What a wonderful promise. ( Deuteronomy 5:9 – 10 You shall not bow down to them or worship them; for I, the LORD your God, am a jealous God, punishing the children for the sin of the parents to the third and fourth generation of those who hate me, 10 but showing love to a thousand generations of those who love me and keep my commandments. ) This is my recent story of blessings.

I have been working on a vision of connecting people, businesses, and real world entities through the cloud. I started this year by myself, but as I more prayers were answered now, we are three in the team, working on different projects. Everything is still a mess now, we don’t really know where we’re going in 5 years, we’re deciding base on what goes right and what goes wrong in what we do now.  But I clearly see that God is working on Jumie’s and my prayers.

Yesterday, Mitzi, Marc, and I, met with a team of bloggers, I feel that God planned for us to meet them. It was Mitzi who is connected with the blogger, while I was expecting them to be a very big group of blogger, they were not. They were not small. They are just the exact right size, I would like. I did not expect this project to be a “go” project for the team.

I will back track a bit…

Before meeting with the bloggers, Mitzi and I were talking how to fit them into our schedule. We were thinking that this project will delay us from pursuing our goals for a currently ongoing project. I explained my concerns to Mitzi, all the things I am thinking about, where we plan to go and why we should accept a project and why we should not accept the project. I have a lot of presumptions. I forgot to pray… I am sure Mitzi did.

Going back…

I think I lacked faith. I didn’t trust that God will give exactly what we need. I didn’t know that his providence would be so obvious and difficult to miss. I was thinking of a lot of other things, but God has something else in mind. I wanted to keep being small, but God is pushing me to grow. God blessed me with this blog company that’s just the right size so we can offer a partnership with them. They have the audience, we love creativity and technology. God didn’t bless us with a super blogging site to overwhelm us. God didn’t give us a small blogging company that we still need to build up audience. God blessed us with a blogging company that is just right, so we can help them increase from 100,000 to 1,000,000.  It wasn’t a small company that our task would be too big for us to handle, it wasn’t too big that we weren’t without purpose. God’s blessing is just right.

We haven’t close this deal while I am writing this, but I am very optimistic that if God gives this to us…this is where we should go. I hope that me and my team will work hard bringing ideas and features to reality. One reflection though is that when we pray, we need to have faith. Prepare for God’s answer. Expect for answer. Pray expectantly. I am sure Jumie’s prayer, my prayer, and my team’s prayer is moving us and opening these new opportunities for us. God is on His way to answering our prayers, not yet sure if it is with a – yes go on… no, not this, try another one, or wait and keep persevering, I am waiting for you to learn humility and character. What I am sure of is that God is at work and I see His hand every day.

I pray that as we go on enjoying God’s blessing, we can be good stewards. I pray that God be the center of what we do. I pray that He guide us. We are not earning yet, but I pray that with Jumie, I, Mitzi and Marc, we allot 10% of our talents as a thanksgiving to the God who blesses us. I pray that all our projects will be God-centered. I pray that as we go on, enjoying the blessings, we don’t forget the giver of these. It is everyone’s responsibility to bring everything back to God, who makes all things possible. I know that we will be rewarded financially with all of these efforts, but I pray that with all the financial rewards, we can keep reminding each other of our burden to leverage the new opportunities and rewards to share the gospel, share our testimony to more people and bring them to God.


God gave bad mood to Saul…

In Christian Life on September 16, 2011 by erwindlee

I am reading 1 Samuel today. In my Bible readings before, I never noticed God giving bad things to His creation. The Bible is always about God giving good things, blessings, love, and promises. If God is angry, he gives punishments but I never read that God give bad things to cause man to sin until I read in 1 Samuel that God gave Saul bad moods. What? How can a good God give bad things? It is totally opposite His character. It is even written that God is the giver of all good things. So I prayed about this, asking God to reveal to me why he give a bad thing, a thing that can even cause someone to sin.

God answered my prayer by showing me an example in my own life. I saw that whenever I sin big time and routinely, I am given bad moods, depression, and all the bad feelings. I am no talking about the small sin that we all commit every day, but the sins that we do even if we know that it is wrong. These are the sins that we intentionally do because we know God is merciful, and that He will definitely forgive us, anyway.

I am a child of God, God punishes me. During Saul’s time, Samuel gave Saul God’s blessing to be Israel’s first king but Samuel was not after God’s heart. God gave up on Samuel, and He started preparing David to be king. But I believe God wants the best for Saul. He gave the bad moods to wake Saul up, hoping to bring him back on track.

I believe that bad moods and depression needs to be prayed on. It can be 2 things, first is that God talking to us, asking us to reflect and look at what we’re doing do and second is maybe the Devil is using it to grab our joy. If we are sad or in a bad mood, pray that God protect us from the Devil and second, pray that we can identify our sin and conquer it through the power of the Holy Spirit.


Reboot of The Adventures

In Christian Life, Everyday Life on September 12, 2011 by erwindlee

I have been gone in the blogging world for who knows how long.

I was in college when I started blogging. No one knows what blogging is, no one is doing it but I did. My blog was hosted in of Microsoft before. That was in 2002 almost 10 years ago. Whew, time flies.

I transferred to Windows Live Spaces, Microsoft’s second attempt in blogging which except for the movie feature which allowed me to put all the photos of the movies I watched, wasn’t able to catch up with the new features of blogspot, wordpress, live journal, and other blogging tools. Later on, Microsoft gave up and tranferred all its members to WordPress. I stopped blogging, all togther.

Now, here I am again writing this entry because I realize that blogging brings back memories, and makes us realized how we matured. It makes us remember who we were, and to compare it with who we become. Thank you for blogging!

So, who am I. I am Erwin Lee, a new creature of God, redeemed by Jesus. I am a sinner trying to get out of this habit of sin and with the grace of God, and power of the Holy Spirit, trying to be more like Jesus in my heart, thought, and actions. I am a developer, who denies that coding is important to his existence. I did that by trying to leave the IT industry, and later on finding out that I need to code something, with or without pay. I am a backyard farmer, trying to grow mushrooms in a backroom during my spare time. I love the park and fresh air, but I don’t like the sun. I love land, I don’t like the sand and the sea. I love bikes, but haven’t been on it since I left Shanghai in 2009. I am not very creative but my current projects are squeezing and honing my creativity levels to the highest! I am a trainee of my dad in his business. I am an errands boy who do a lot of the repair work in our home. I do book keeping, and recording for my dad’s business and my business with my sisters. I answer the phone, entertain customers in our small business, write receipts, maintain the cars, among others. I am currently engaged and my fiancee is the most beautiful, loving and sweetest girl in the entire world. Most of all, I am a child of God in training. I am a saved piece of junk for Jesus.

In the next entries, I hope I can restart reflecting and thanking God for the big and small things he has done for me and my fiancee. Enjoy life! Live by faith, faith not on ourselves, by on our Father in heaven.

To God be the Glory…


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